Whew....

How do you pack in a gazillion stories, details and thoughts in a quick, witty, and interesting blog post. I don't know if you can. Can you really reflect on 20 years in a nutshell? Where you have been, what you have done and where you are now without going through all the weird emotions attached or do you just enjoy the moment? I can say truthfully I enjoyed the moments-without the incredibly painful red eye of course (Don't worry Bobbi-more on that later) and all the crazy fears and obsessions I had about the "big" evening were mostly-mostly laid to rest. Did I feel like the awkard person at the kegger come Friday night like I used to? You betcha-I didn't think I would and still did. Was it because of self conciousness or not being "cool" enough, as was the reasoning in high school. Definitely not. Was it snottiness or boredom on my part? I don't think so. Does it make me a shallow person NOT to be like Karen and love to hear others stories? I don't think it was that either. I think at this age the need to be with those who love you best for all of your faults and ugly parts along with all the rock star parts matters more to me than anything. It is a feeling of HOME (I think Karen knows exactly what I am trying to articulate).

So here is to you my wonderful 20 year friends, as I sit here crying-the tears I couldn't last night with good byes- at the computer while 2 of you are on the road and one will be leaving soon. I cry for all the parts of me that have changed-the bigger parts:) and the better parts. Tears for the next 20 years and what they might bring and how I can't wait to share them with you. And finally sad and happy tears for all that I am blessed with.