As my oldest and dearest friends know I am not a "people person". I make friends slowly, dig in deep and keep a few. I have been known to not have a lot of empathy or a filter at times. Definitely not like Karen who meets and loves everyone, or Carey who is constantly funny, or Chris who dares new things. Bobbi, I know touches people through her strenght of faith.
It is weird that with all of these non-people traits of mine that I do FEEL for people and very much so, especially those who I work with and for-teachers, parents, students all of them.
Yesterday one of my first year teachers in her early 20's asked to talk to me. She told me she has cancer-early 20's people! Not married, no children, her family isn't here and she has to tell me, her boss this. I was devastated. She said "this really sucks" and all I could say was "I know". There are a few other whoppers from the week that I could tell, but my professional ethics are strong.
I just want to scoop some of these people up and make it better. All these parents who are lost, grieving, given up control. Moms who are in terrible patterns of behavior that cost their daughters' a future-think TLC's "Intervention", and that is no exaggeration. Staff who struggle with illnesses, relationships, tough kids, and their own parenting worries and woes-we do laugh about lots of those.
I have gone from digging deep with a few, to digging deep with many. This whole huge extended family is not what this private person signed up for but I think it may be just what I was made for.
Well there, there are my random Thursday thoughts!
4 comments:
I am proud of you, Cher. Don't underestimate yourself. Those of us who know you best KNOW that you have what it takes to be a help and support for these people. I love you.
oh cher. i am like you, not really a 'people person'...i usually only like 3-5 people in my life at most :)
i've been amazed at the number of crises my students come to me with, from family members who have had strokes/heart attacks, to many (young!) of them working full time with multiple kids, abusive spouses, etc. i am like you. i could jump out of my skin, i want to just take them all home and love on them.
sigh. we do what we can, knowing we were placed where we are for a reason. it's so neat that you know that, and i'm sure that you are making a huge difference.
I love that your job is a vehicle to stretch you more and more out of your comfort zone. Stretching can be painful and confusing at times but makes you an even better person than you were before. I love what this experience is doing for you! I also know how hard it is to balance all the hardships your people bring to you and still keep the ship running. You are doing a far better job at this! Sometimes, they really just want to know that you listened and care.
i know that you are a rock, cher. you are there because you are softer than you think and also much tougher than you give yourself credit for. the perfect combination for your job...and for a lifelong friendship.
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